I was in the front office at work and Front Office Girl #1 called out across the hall to Front Office Dude, “FOD, did you steal all my blue pens?”
I informed FOG1 that FOD wasn’t in his office, and he promptly appeared in the hall at the far end. I informed him he was being accused of something.
He asked what, and FOG1 repeated her question. He denied it and they had a brief conversation on the topic. During this time, I was using the Heavy Duty Swingline Stapler to repair a manual needed by those of us who do Real Work, and I finished up and drifted into FOD’s office.
So what’s up? he says. I informed him their heavy duty stapler was working, because (I said) I know you were very concerned about it. He mentioned that FOG2 also sometimes accused him of stealing her pens.
I called out to FOG1 across the hall, “What, just because we’re men, we’re stealers? Just because we steal your hearts doesn’t mean we steal your pens!”
FOD was drinking his coffee and it went down wrong instead of going all over his desk, keyboard, and monitors. He recovered alright but it was touch and go there for a few seconds.
Women accusing men of stealing things other than hearts: DEADLY DANGEROUS!!!